Trusted

It was a gift
and I held it in my hands
regulated with a pulse of exposed emotions
it was firm
but pliable underneath my influence
perhaps a word, a tone, a glance could make it cease -
- so great was the responsibility
- greater than I wish to admit

It was a gift
and I locked it up, tight
trying maybe saving it from the murder I could....commit

maybe

One day, a recall
One day you'll take back(heart)
A swift searing pain
A recoil of raw emotions

and I'll realise with a wry stretched smile
what happens when your love kills
and though it was a gift I'll return it

and I will know it(heart) like my own(heart)
because so long it had been mine(heart)

and it'll still be regulated with the pulse of denied emotions

And you will blame me.

The blame:
It's termination
It's wretched hurt
It's pallid beat -
damn it 
It's blood should never
It's blood could never
Be on my hands

- because it was a gift.

11.1.2006